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Here Is My Cheap Bastard List (so far)

Most of these addresses are customers in Trumbull, unless otherwise specified. If you’re on this list, you’re a cheap asshole who has no regard for the work we do, the danger we face on the roads, and I sincerely hope you aren’t as much of a cheap loser when you go out to a restaurant. May 100,000 stomach aches plague you for your stinginess.

Cheap Customers
44 Spinning Wheel Road: $40 order, $1.45 tip.
58 Mooreland: $60 order, $2 tip.
10222 Avalon Gates: $32 order, $2 tip.
32 Reiner Drive: $94 order, $5 tip.
8 Meadow Ridge: $80 order, $5 tip.
23 Morningside, Easton, two towns away: $40, always $2 tip.
47 Scenic Hill: $24 order, $1.75 tip.
15 Corporate Drive, across town for $2 tip on $25 order.
64 Evelyn, no lights $30 order, $2 tip.
27 Maple St: $35 order, $1.50 tip.
17 Nichols Farm Road: $33 order, $2 tip, huge house.
106 Oakridge: $91 order, $5 tip.
44 Plymouth: $60 order, $3 tip. 12 miles round trip.
25 Gorham Place: $22 order, $0 tip. Thank you doesn’t pay for my gas.
23 Laurel Drive: $30 order, $3 tip. 10 miles round trip.
3090 Reservoir: $17 order, 86 cents for a tip, made me wait 10 minutes.
16 Valley View: $43 order, $1 tip.
39 Pemberton: $50 order, $2 tip.
15 Rock Spring Road: $50 order, $3 tip. Always.
82 Lance Circle: $51 order, $3 tip
23 Doe Hollow: $30 order, 36 cent tip. Assholes
50 Greenwood Drive: $45 order, $1.50 tip, 12 miles round trip.
Louis Muniz School: $105 order, 5 cent tip. Fucking losers.
47 Nelson Terrace: $20 order, no tip.
2600 Park Avenue Fairfield, $15 order, $2 tip, but really far
1225 Cutspring Road Stratford: $70 order, $3 tip, 10 miles round trip
15 Hilsboro Road: $40 order, no tip. Fucktards
175 Isinglas Road Shelton: $30 order, $0 tip. Losers.
55290 Park Ave, Suite 204, Hair salon: $40 order, 17 cent tip. I’m going to get my hair done at your place sometime and return that 17 cent tip.
95 Aspen Lane: $70 order, $5 tip
Bridgeport Tax Collector’s Office: $65 order, $5 tip+ called and said I spilled the sauce and was extremely rude. BULLSHIT. I’m always nice because I want tip money morons.
35 Candlewood: Got $1.50 tip on a $45 order. These people usually either tip a quarter, or have exact change, leaving you with nothing.

The Driver (Adam Smith)

© Adam Smith and drivershout.wordpress.com, 2009. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Adam Smith and drivershout.wordpress.com with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

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“Kick Rocks” Pizza Delivery Nightmares by Adam Smith is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License

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  1. Jay

    This list is really not that bad, as I read your blog I’m starting to think your a bit spoiled by this whole tip thing. 2$ tips aren’t bad, 3 – 5$ tips are good, 5 or more is holy grail of tippers. Don’t cry so much and look at it this way: at least you got something from a majority of your shitty tippers. Where I deliver, my shitty tippers list would be longer than yours with a lot more 0’s so be thankful 😉

  2. adam smith

    First off, my list is much longer, it just isn’t all on here. Second, if you’re happy with $2 tips, good for you, but it’s not a standard tip. Waiters get 15% Delivery drivers are supposed to get at least 15%. We have much more to pay for like gas, oil, etc, and the job is way more dangerous than theirs is. So we expect a little extra for that, too.

    But it’s okay, the customers who tip poorly just get shitty service.

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